What does #bestmomlife means to you?
Have you actually taken the time to envision how it looks like to live your best life every day?
In today's episode, I will share with you why it is important to know what is your #bestmomlife and how to discover yours.
The transcript is available below the audio.
Hey there, today I want to talk about something I mention very often in my Instagram caption. And if you are in my community, you would have received my newsletters, I talk about it a lot. It is something call the #bestmomlife.
What does #bestmomife means to you? I mean, we see it very often, right? Live your best life, your #bestmomlife, oh, we live the best that we can. But, have you actually taken the time to envision how would everyday living to the best be like for you?
To me, it certainly starts from within. I feel like we cannot be living our best life even if we have everything we want. And by everything, I mean our external world, the house, the car, the clothes, the shoes, you name it. All those things.
But, if we are feeling unfulfilled and constantly have that tuck of war inside our heart, feeling like we should be spending more time with the kids, or should we be advancing our career or things like I am not doing enough or you are feeling trapped in a job or marriage or any situation, then we are certainly not having our best life.
Here is the thing. Many of the key insights of my work with moms over the last eight years has been that #bestmomlife can be quite different for each of us.
For you, it might be your ability to just go out and buy that thousand dollar shoes today. I mean, great, right? No problem with that at all. Go for it. For others, it might be being able to pick up their son or daughter from school at 2pm. That can be and is a #bestmomlife.
But one of the things I like to do, and you know, I started talking about living a life to our best ability is that I do not talk about hustling. I don't talk about working ourselves to the bones, waking up early, and then being the last person to go to bed at night.
I like to ask people what their #bestmomlife is. If you have not actually given this any thought at all, perhaps stop for a moment, stop this podcast, pause it right now and think about it. I mean, if you are driving, do not stop yourself right in the middle of the road. But take your time. What is #bestmomlife for you?
And why is it important, you ask me. Why is it important for me to know what my #bestmomlife is? Here is the thing. We always feel like, oh, okay, I just want to make the most money, hustle the most, do the best that I can for my kids. But is that really how you want to live your life? I see a lot of people looking forward to the weekends. They are having their Monday blues.
"Oh my God, I look forward to the weekend."
"Yes, thank God, it is Friday. It is the weekend tomorrow."
But why can't we just live every day as if it is the weekend? I mean, it has got nothing to do with the amount of work or what you need to accomplish during the weekdays.
For me, my weekdays are pretty much the same as my weekends except that my kids are home most of the days on weekends. Yes, we get to spend more time, but I get to decide how I want to live my weekdays so that it is the #bestmomlife for me.
I know I always use morbid thoughts like dying to snap people into action because really, time is not promised to us. We do not know how long we will live. And can you imagine out of your whole year; 365 days, you only have 52 Saturdays and 52 Sundays – that's 104 days. So technically, you are only enjoying a third of your life that you truly enjoy.
Why do we look forward to the weekends? Why can't we live every day as if it is our best life? So that is why I want to come back to the start where I asked you to just pause and imagine what would a perfect day for you be like? Of course, we will have those days.
When I ask people, they will say like traveling, I have the freedom to do what I want to do and that is like the number one thing. Of course, I get that. But really, how would it look like? It is so important for us to have that visualisation; to have that visual of how we like our best day to be like.
My day-to-day could be different. But there is an overarching theme to it. Right now, just take the time to think about how you would live your best life.
In my Passion to Profit webinar, where I help people understand what they actually want to do with their life, do you want to know what is the top three answers people give me?
Well, number one is freedom: “I want to do what I want when I want.” And then sometimes they will say like: “Oh, I want to pay off my debt.” In my opinion, it is a deem dream because if your only goal is to live your life just to get to zero, that is not very motivating. Finally, you have people talk about having lots of money.
Me: So, what would you do with the money?
Student: I want to eat at the best restaurant that I could afford.
Me: Okay. Then what if you could quadruple your spending?
Student: I still want to eat at the best restaurant that I can afford.
Do you get my point here? People are very vague. Even if I tell them, even if I ask them to tell me how they would like to spend all the money.
I want you to be able to live your #bestmomlife and the way to do that is to be clear, have the clarity of what #bestmomlife actually is.
When I push you to think about what your #bestmomlife is and what do you want. And suddenly, things can change because we are no longer just bound by our 3D world. Or we are no longer just bound by our circumstances because what we can achieve and what we can make out of a life comes from within.
It is not because, oh, I have this, so I become this. It is more like you have to become that person in order to have what you want in life. Here is an example of something that my husband just shared on Instagram story recently. He goes to the gym and has recently taken up weightlifting and a lot heavier than he used to lift. So, one of the philosophies around weightlifting is not that, oh, I want to lift 150kg at one go. Of course, you go from 30kg, 60kg, 90kg, 120kg and 150kg.
Instead of saying my goal is to lift 150kg, you have to first become that person you want to be – a weightlifter. So, it should be: "I am a weightlifter, and I will get to 150kg.”
I want you really, dream as much as you can. Something that we lost as we grow up is the ability to dream. Dream is cheap. Dream is unlimited. Cheap is good, in my opinion. It does not cost you any money. So, use the ability to dream. And when you have a clear visualisation of how you would like your life to be, you are three times more likely to achieve them.
So, what is my life purpose? What is my ultimate best day? I could tell you my day-to-day life looks very different. One day, it could be all day like today, just recording content, recording podcast, submitting caption to brand, writing more content to help my students at MomBoss Academy.
But ultimately, the overarching theme for me is to wake up and do what I want every day for freedom in my life. Yes, I want freedom and what I do every day contributes to that freedom that I want. I could pick up the phone like today and show up for women or moms to serve them on a higher level. Or maybe I wake up and I do not really feel like doing that. And that is okay because I can afford to do that.
When I go to a grocery store, something that I have achieved is that I no longer look at the price tag, I just take it. If I want it, it is in my basket. And that is freedom to me. I have that freedom in my life.
Now what that freedom creates for me, is a better life for my kids. Is it better for my kids? Yes. Because I have the freedom to be there for them if I want to. Of course, it is always down to whether you want it or not and not being bound by: “I want to, but my work requires me otherwise.” Or “My other commitment requires me otherwise.”
I have the freedom to contribute to my family so that means spending time with my kids on their homework when they need me. And I have the freedom to support causes that I love. Back in pre-COVID-19 days, I have the freedom to travel as and when I want and experience life in fun ways. I am able to support my friends and my family, whoever may need it.
So perhaps that is something for you too. Whatever it is, it is what you think about. So, I just want you to think a little bit deeper into what your #bestmomlife looks like. Think bigger. It is possible.
My definition of #bestmomlife is living every day doing things that makes me happy. And yes, that includes work because my why I told you earlier, is to create freedom for myself and for others.
And so, if this resonates with you, I hope that you enjoyed this episode. Please leave me a comment on my blog. If you want to join my community at MomBosses United, a free community on Facebook, go over there and let me know that you enjoyed this. Or you can just screenshot this podcast right now and invite more people to listen to it.
I hope everyone gets to live their #bestmomlife because life is short, live every day as if it is your last day. Thank you for listening.